Here are the Cancer Fighters.....

I usually downplay myself sometimes. Getting all emotional, crying my eyes out, hating the world for the cards I was dealt. Sometimes... not every time..... I wont disregard the fact, that everyone goes through this pain. Wishing they had someone elses' life, because they don't have to live with chemotherapy rushing through their veins everyday. Waking up cloudy every morning, your first signs of light blurred due to all the extra pills you take just not to feel the burn through your body. Just not to feel that nausea that has an awkward resemblance to a scene from exorcist.... odd... throwing up is the worst... strangely chemotherapy always finds itself in your nasal cavity. lol... The long term effects of taking relaxing pills just to live and not feel pain has its bouts of depression that you fight up with when you see that downward spiral coming at you full speed ahead. You will avoid it like hell and try to fill your days with activities and avoid anyone that reminds you of some sad part of your life. (sorry peeps) The disadvantages of cancer and taking chemotherapy are many and you cant really pick which is worse compared. Throwing up........ tired all day...... depression....hmmmmmmmm.... which one.... Not only you have to deal with these on my own. But, to deal with the externals. Peoples emotions, their life, their arguments, their hate, their disagreements. I deal with the typical flaws of man.... the many flaws.... I dealt with the ups and downs of relationships.... I dealt with the break ups.... I dealt with trying to pick up the pieces. I manage my loneliness.... I manage the silent nights.... I manage coming home to a cold tomb stone.... I manage my studies.... I manage maintaining my abode.... I manage my tiredness.... I manage everything...... But, with all that.... and chemo,and every other possible poison still rushing through your blood every living second of my existence. I figured out. I got up every morning. I got up and did everything on my own. I took chemo on my OWN. If I feel weak... I will drag myself out the door to work or train.... I got up everyday to go through the day all on my own. What i sometimes forget to do, is thank God and pat myself on the back for being a fighter. For giving me parents like mine. For giving me a support group that tells me when they get the chance "i will do it all over again".... When chemo starts hurting, I still hold myself up, during every meeting, then wrap up and head to train, drive myself home in pain then head to work with little hours sleep.. to do it all over again the next day. .... I have been through hell, but, I get up every time to hit the fight all over again everyday. When everything seems dim and I am really beaten to the pulp, I want it.... I will relish it. Because it will make me stronger than before. Thank you support for being in my corner. But, I will pick myself every time, with every breath and head back to the life I want to make for myself. Everyday is a fight, and I have been through shit, and I will take the crap, and the hurt, but, it is not in my blood to give up. My parents did not fight this long and hard for me to give up now. I will fight just as hard until my last. When that day comes. Will never put my head down....

I will fight every day that God gives me.... and I will give it my all....... Hope this gets to other Cancer patients that are going through the lonely parts of this fight.... Remember, just get up and move..... accept the scars and pain.... those will push you to fight harder. Pick yourself up and move..... Ms. Shivana Singh Cancer Patient.... Fighter..... Survivor..... Till the referee rings the bell Till both your eyes starts to swell Till the crowd goes home.......